How Long More?

I just dont know how long more I can stand. I have been really tolerant all these years. I really dont know how else I can be. I just let him be who he is. I let him go where he wants to go. I allow him to do whatever he wants to do. I always believe that he is old enough to do what is right and able to judge what is wrong. He made a million in 2 weeks. He did not buy anything nice for me. He did not even bring me to a nice dinner. He did not plan to bring me for a holiday. I did not ask anything from him. I respect him, he said he needs those money for our kids. But he lost 2/3 of those. What have I got to say? What is this? He lost so much and yet, I did not ask one question, I did not scold. I did not throw my tantrums on him. I am just so disappointed. He always plans his trips with his friends but never with me. And when I say I wanna go out, he just ask why am I going so many places in a year or so. Why why why? I am just so fed up. He wakes up late, around noon. He goes out with his friends till late at night. Coming back at 1 or 2am is considered early for him. He cannot stay in the house. He complains that I dont bring my kids home to sleep, but when I do, he will leave the house as usual. So what is the point? He expects me to work, take care of the kids, do this, do that, do everything. He expects me to do all housework, and on the hand tells me that I should also support the family. So what is the use of having a husband? What is the use of having him when I can do everything on my own? I told myself... Please dont be too independant. If one day, I feel that I can do everything on my own and not need him, I might make rash decisions. This is not a life that I want. This is not a husband that I want. This is not a father I want for my kids. I'm just a simply lady. All I want is a normal home. A husband who works and love and care, a father who loves and play. I only want a family like my own. A husband like my dad or my brother. Am I asking for too much? Ok, he has been waking up rather late every weekday, so what is the problem with waking up early on weekends? To be with the kids, to bring us out. By the time he wakes up, it's already time for my kids to nap. Is this a family? I am still standing where I am for the sake of my kids. Really. And I know it's sad, but I have tried moving on. I really want to be home, but when he goes out and leaves me alone at home, I feel frustrated and mad. I would rather go back to my mum's house than to sleep alone. How am I suppose to live like this anymore?