sometimes i just hate listening to songs. it reminds me of so many things. it really digs out the deepest memories. that is why i have stopped listening to the songs that i have heard with him. all seemed so clear in mind. last night i bought "sex & the city". i have always loved this show. it taught me a lot of things, that i sometimes wished i had watched it earlier... then maybe i could have made a better decision.
i have always thought that Carrie will never end up with Big. but somehow they did. and Big emailed Carrie, his very last mail read "i know i screwed up, but i will always love you..."
at that very moment, i wanted to message LOL the exact words. but to think of it again, what's the use? why should i? why should i even care after what he said to me? how can i actually still have thoughts about him? what have i done so bad that made him say that 2 words to me?
i really wanted to send him a mail asking him why did i do that made him so mad at me. if it's because i changed my number, it's really stupid. he doesnt know what i have been through. he doesnt know what he had done to me - mentally. i now believe, what hurts most is not the phsyical part, it's the mental part.
bruises and cuts can heal. but the feelings and memory cannot...
1 comment:
I still don't know what made u leave LOL. As you said, he dont know what u have been through. So may be u can keep writing the stuff and reason and all, may be at the end sometime we might find out what made him say what he said....keep writing and keep loving u're kids.
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