Well, it has been 4 1/2 hours since I got the news of LOL being married. And for the past 4 1/2 hours I have been thinking of him so much. I knew this would come, that was why I chose not to know. Somehow, I guess Chyee thinks that he doesn't mean anything to me anymore.
Don't get me wrong. I am not going to divorce or do anything crazy. This is just a feeling. A feeling that we human have and have no control of. We can hide in front of everyone, but deep in us - it'll be there forever.
So are you telling me that I can sit on the same table with him, have a nice talk over lunch? Don't be silly. I don't know about others, but for me - a big no way. There is no way I can see him and have nothing happened.
I remembered the last time I met him in KLCC with Gina, he gave me a good bye kiss and I cried the whole day.
I didn't realise the feeling towards him was still so strong until today when I got the news. I know that people would think that I am crazy to still have such a feeling. To still have thoughts of him at this point. As I have said, I will not do anything crazy, this is just a feeling I cannot stop. If I can cry, I would. But what for? I am a wife and a mother. He is a husband and a father. Is there a point?
No matter what, there is no way that can change his part in my life.
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